Mom

 It is such a simple word....mom, just three letters, one of which repeats.  Tomorrow is Mother's Day, and Marilyn and I are blessed to be in St. Louis to spend Mother's Day with my mom.  We are going to celebrate my going to church together, then coming back to her and Tom's condo and having pulled pork for lunch.  Following that, we will visit, tell big ones and watch the Cardinals.  Sounds like it is going to be a pretty good day.

This past year has been a rough one for my mother.  As she approaches her 89th birthday this fall, it is natural, and expected for there to be health issues, and the past 12 months were no exception.  She has neuropathy in her feet, which makes her unsteady, consequently there were some falls, which resulted with several trips to the ER, a couple of the falls resulted in broken bones, and a partial replacement of one of her hips.  She was diagnosed with breast cancer and had a bout of pneumonia in both lungs, both of which she brushed off as if they were a housefly.  There was also a three-week stay in residential rehab.  

Yet last night, she had dinner prepared, wonderful meatloaf, roasted potatoes with various herbs, salad and sourdough bread.  She also surprised me by baking several loaves of Boston Brown Bread, one of my favorite things she makes.  She and my stepfather Tom are happy, despite slowing down and having various health issues.  They love each other very much and are a pleasure to watch.

I was blessed with wonderful parents, and I know my brother Barry will say the same thing.  I know he will have something personal and meaningful to say as well on his forum.  This morning on this blog, I am going to focus on some ways my mother has been an influence on me.  Personality traits that have carried down from the Dalton and Poteet family tree

My dad passed away in 2009, and I miss him every day.  A kind man and great example, with tremendous work ethic.  He loved God, my mother and my brother and I.  And everybody loved him, and I am grateful for what he taught me, and for the personality traits I inherited from him.

But I can same say the same thing about my mother, and I want to touch on a few of the things I learned from her and continue to learn.

Love God Always - This really should come as no surprise.  All of you who know her know how much of a servant she was.  Whether it be cooking for someone, opening up their home for family, friends and strangers.  rushing to the side of a friend going through rough times to listen to them or hold them.  I know she loved my dad and Tom, my brother and I, but first and foremost she loves God.

Love your Spouse - There is no doubt my mother and father shared a deep love for each other.  They demonstrated their love each other and talked about it in front of the kids.  We learned to love from the example they set.  The example?  Love unconditionally, acknowledge mistakes, be forgiving, learn to like the same things, as mentioned above, put God first in everything.  Never go to bed mad, let your children see you love each other.

Love your Family - Growing up my mother had over two dozen first cousins.  I have six.  The majority of her cousins lived close to her in Biggers and Reyno in Randolph County, Arkansas.  Both sides of her family are precious to her.  We spent many, many long weekends or vacations driving to Arkansas to spend time with family.  When we get together, like this weekend, I will spend a lot of time listening to her talk about her cousins, Dickie and Herman, Jean and Brenda, Donald and Wayne and all the fun they had.  There are more stories about her grandparents and numerous aunts and uncles.  Family is important, love them, keep in touch, let them know you are thinking of them and miss them.   That is a trait I definitely inherited.

Nurture Friendships - One things that has been very hard on my mother as she has grown older is losing so many friends.  It depresses her.  Last night as we were sitting around the dinner table talking after we had finished our meal, she talked about Kay and Mona, and Beverly and Barbara, and how much she misses them, as all have dies in the past few years. She talks about her friends who are still here but are struggling with their health.  Faye and Fern, Frances and Ann.  Her cousins Lynn and Ann.  She still talks to them frequently, cherishing the bond that still exists.  

That trait certainly was passed down to me.  I think of the friends I have had and have now, how much they have meant to me and how much I appreciate them.  As I get older, I try to make more of an effort to stay in touch.  My cousin Frank, my brother-in-law Mike, my South Georgia friend Mike are all like extra brothers.  Lisa and Paige were daughters of my parent's best friends; I consider them my sisters.  Since moving to Alabama, I have been blessed beyond measure by Ken, Will and Donnie, Amanda, Tiffany and Allison.  Credit goes to my mother as I watched nurture and cherish her friends,  I do too.

Travel - It seems like every year growing up, we went somewhere on vacation.  As I mentioned earlier, we made frequent trips to Arkansas to see family.  We made trips to Hawaii, to Florida, to Washington DC, to Europe.  My parents shared a sense of adventure and travel, and that was a trait that was passed down.  Mom was the travel planner, and dad was always ready to go.  Me too.

Cooking - My mother is a wonderful cook, her mother, my Granny, was a wonderful cook.  Mom was a master at being creative, she could open the pantry door, look at what was available, grab a few things and within an hour have a tasty, unnamed dish on the table.  It was and still is incredible.  It is no stretch to know that both my brother and I love to cook and be creative when we cook.  There is no doubt that gift came from her.

Writing - Ah, you knew this one was coming didn't you.  I love to write, I worked for a newspaper for 15 years, and on average would write 7,000 to 8,000 words a week.  It was easy, it was fun, I genuinely love to write.  But it had to come from somewhere, and it came from my mother., and for that I am very grateful.

Laugh - I learned at a young age it is good to have a sense of humor.  It really is the best medicine.  Our house was frequently filled with laughter and I learned not to take myself too seriously.  Have you noticed you can't laugh without smiling.  I love to laugh....a lot.  Yeah, this probably should have been higher.

I am very grateful God gave me the mother he did.  As it is in everything, his wisdom is perfect.  She was not perfect, but she was perfect for my dad, Barry and myself.  I am blessed beyond measure that at 88 she is still with us and doing pretty well.  I give thanks to God for that every single day.

If your mother is still alive, I hope you have opportunity to see her or talk to her.  If your mother has passed, cherish the memories you have, and take stock of the ways she still influences you.

We are a blessed people.  Have a great week.  Be kind to each other.