Remembering the First Grade

A month or two ago, I was going through a photo album my mother had put together nearly 40 years ago for Trish, whom I was engaged to at the time.  It was an album full of family pictures, vacations, and a few shots of yours truly.  

One of the many pictures inside was one of my first-grade class.  I started first grade in September 1963, Iveland School in Overland, Missouri, part of the Ritenour School District.  My teacher was Mrs. Sartin.  Interestingly, my brother would have her two years later.  Our principal, Mrs. Kegelman, who I believed to be 100 years old, was also in the picture.

There are four rows of children, 25 in all, 12 girls, 13 boys.  I am on the back row, second student from the right.  Most of us are smiling or at least trying to.  We all look fresh in our clean clothes, obviously we hadn't been to P.E. or recess yet.  I am positive I am wearing jeans and a short-sleeve brown checked shirt.  The photo is in black and white, but I remember the shirt.  Trust me, it was brown and light brown.  I also have a t-shirt on.  My short hair is not combed, though I'm sure it was when I left the house, and I am not smiling.  In other words, a typical picture of me at six-year-old.

As I studied the picture, everyone looked familiar, but not all the names.  I probably remember the names of two-thirds of the kids.

First grade in the Ritenour District was new for us, because we had to go to school all-day, as our kindergarten was only half a day, so this seemed like forever.  I do remember we had a recess in the morning and one in the afternoon.  There was also P. E. thrown in, so we got out of the room and could be kids at least three times a day.  As they said in Monty Python and the Holy Grail, "and there was much rejoicing."  

One other nice thing about first grade, we got to eat lunch at school.  You could take your lunch (this was me most days, PB&J with any jelly but grape, chips and a cookie, I would buy milk in the cafeteria) or go through the cafeteria line and get a tray with all sorts of goodies on it.  Can you see the blue font?  

The local weekly newspaper, the Community News would have the following weeks school lunch menus.  I would study it and decide what days I would take my lunch, and what days I would buy my lunch, usually pizza or hamburger days (why did they always have peas or green beans as a side with the pizza?  Nobody does that).  Lunch in the cafeteria in the fall of 1963 I believe was ten cents.  A carton of milk, white or chocolate, was two cents for a half-pint.  We would eat out lunch way to fast because when we were finished, we could go outside and play!

Let's meet the kids of Mrs. Sartin's first-grade class of 1963-64, at least those I can remember.

First row (all girls), Loretta Smith, unknown, Karen U (only remember it started with a U), Denye Schultz (probably tallest girl in class), Linda Mitchell (fastest girl in Class, faster than most of the boys, and she ran bare-foot), Cindy Lawson, Susan ?, and Terri Smith  (She was in all of my classes through like the 8th grade).

Second row: First two are a young man, then a girl that I don't remember.  Karen Pemberton (cutest girl in class), another girl I don't remember, Debbie Laschober (I probably misspelled her last name), and Richard Derbak (a fellow baseball lover, and a good friend for a long time. He and I and his brother Greg were always swapping baseball cards.)

Third row:  Drew Krah (the only redhead in class, and among the boys, the only left-hander), unknown, Charlie Klein (I never got in a fight in school, but Charlie and I, who were friends, did get in a wrestling march walking the block and a half home one day.  By the next day we had both forgotten it), Mark Bereyso (his hair was white, and he also lived next door to Linda Mitchell), Ronnie English (Ronnie just died earlier this summer.  Had a twin brother named Rob in a different first-grade class.  Another guy I played baseball with a lot.  Ronnie was probably the most-gifted natural athlete in the entire first grade.  As a guy, you recognize such things. One other note, Ronnie, Rich Derbak and I all lived on Eastbrook Drive), Mark Bledsoe. (His house bordered the school, and I remember him going home for lunch almost every day.  He also lived next door to Terri Smith), I don't remember the last guy in row three, but he does have a bow tie on.

Row four:  Mrs. Sartin, Tim Hamilton, (Had an older brother named Tom, who later dated Linda Mitchell), Butch Jacobs, Dalton Sullivan (has an award-winning blog), Rob Roy Sims and Mrs. Kegelman (did I mention she was like 100 years old!)

So there you have it.  My first-grade class at Iveland Elementary, 1836 Dyer, Overland Mo., 63114.  It's nice to look back at 63 years ago.  Can't believe I remember all those names, but I am not surprised I remember all those memories.  Good times kids, good times.   Did I ever tell you about getting sent to the principal's office in kindergarten?  It's a funny story.  Maybe in a blog down the road.

Have a great week, and y'all be nice to each other.

SEC Picks - Week 5

 I cannot believe it has been a week since I posted a blog.  I guess there is was nothing on my mind.  Hint, that's a lie, there is always something on my mind, it's just a matter of do I want to say it?  Know what I mean.?   Well maybe this coming week I'll find my backbone.

Anyway, let's go to this week's selections.  We had a pretty good week last week, going 2-0 in SEC conference games and 9-1 overall.  Our overall record now stands at 6-1 in conference games and 45-8 overall.  Actually, this was our second good week in a row.  The only miss last weekend, that of course would be Arkansas losing by a point at Memphis.  I should have seen that coming.

By the way, if you would like to occasionally switch over to NBC to watch some Ryder Cup golf on Saturday, you have my permission and blessing.  OK, get your snacks handy and let's proceed to this week's picks.  

Notre Dame at Arkansas - 11a - ABC - The Fighting Irish have won one game, over Purdue last week.  Big deal.  They have been beaten twice, by Miami and A&M.  That is a big deal.  I think Arkansas Coach Sam Pittman's seat is so hot, he can't sit down.  He is already filling out change of address forms, with a forwarding address of "to be determined."  Maybe I'm sentimental because I like Coach Pittman, or maybe I am just stupid, but I'm picking the Hogs to upset the Irish.  I know, come Sunday I'll be going, "what was I thinking?"  Arkansas 28, Notre Dame 24

Utah State at Vanderbilt - 11.45a - SEC - Have you noticed, no one is laughing at the Commodores anymore?  Undefeated and ranked.  This is not your father's Vandy.  Vanderbilt 45, Utah State 10

Auburn at Texas A&M - 2.30p - ESPN - I like the ninth-ranked Aggies at Kyle Field.  Auburn is 3-1 and unranked, their only loss came at Oklahoma last week, where the Sooners enjoyed some home Officiating.  Can I say That?  Still, the Aggies prevail.  A&M 40, Auburn 27

LSU at Ole Miss - 2.30p - ABC - Oh, this is going to fun.  I mean a lot of fun.  One of five conference games on this week's docket, I'm taking LSU on the road at Oxford, just as long as they stay out of the Grove before the game.  LSU 34, Ole Miss 31

Tennesse at Mississippi State - 3.15p - SEC - Ok, quick question, which of these two teams are undefeated?  You're right, it is the boys from Starkville!  The Bulldogs are 4-0 and unranked, but the Volunteers are 3-1 and ranked 15th.  Bulldogs win at home in a mild upset.  Mississippi State 35, Tennessee 33

Alabama at Georgia - 6.30p - ABC - Welcome to Saturday night in Athens.  Bama is 2-1, while the Bulldogs are a ho-hum 3-0.  Neither team, in my opinion has looked like what we have come to expect from these two schools based on recent history.  Not seeing Coach Saban on the sideline trying to outcoach his protégé, Coach Smart, is something I truly miss.  The Tide looked good last week, but this is not Louisiana-Monroe.  Georgia 38, Alabama 30

UMass at Missouri - 6.30p - ESPNU - C'mon Tigers, you don't need to be playing schools like this.  We are all very aware of what you have quietly become, a force to be reckoned with in the SEC.  Did you know, since the beginning of 2023, Mizzou has an SEC conference record of 12-5.  That is better than Tennessee (10-7), Texas A&M (9-7), South Carolina (8-10) and the other also rans.  It is the same as Ole Miss and LSU.  Only   Georgia and Alabama have better conference records since the start of 2023. Missouri 52, UMass 0

Kentucky at South Carolina - 6.45p - SEC - I would imagine most sane folks, except those in the Low Country, will be watching Bama and Georgia.  Still, if someone would throw in a couple pounds of snow crab legs, I might could watch.  South Carolina 45, Kentucky 17

Perhaps an upset or two this week, at least I'm predicting that.  We shall see.

Bonus, did you watch the presentation Tuesday night of the three permanent opponents?  You might remember back on Aug. 23rd I tried to do the SEC work for them and predicted the three permanent opponents right.  I did pretty well, let's take a quick review shall we.

Got all three right (5) - Alabama, Georgia, Mississippi State, Tennessee, Texas

Got two of three right (9) - Arkansas, Auburn, Florida, LSU, Missouri, Oklahoma, South Carolina, Texas A&M, Vanderbilt

Got only one of three right (2) - Kentucky, Ole Miss

Ome other fun fact about the permanent opponents.  The Missouri Tigers and Texas Longhorns will have the same three annual foes as determined by the league office in Birmingham.  Both the Tigers and Longhorns will play Arkansas, Oklahoma and Texas A&M.  I think that is pretty cool.

That is it for this week.  Hope you have a terrific weekend.  Be kind to each other.

SEC Picks - Week 4

 Hey all, welcome back to another fun-filled week of college football in the best conference in the nation.  That's right, the SEC is in full steam as we head into week four.

We had a really good week last week, going 3-1 in conference games and 11-1 overall.  The only game I missed. Vandy at South Carolina.  If only you knew how close I came to picking the Commodores.  Oh well, go with your gut.  So, after three weeks, our record stands at 4-1 in conference games and 36-7 in all games.  Who was it, Adam Sandler, who said, "not too shabby."  Well, you know and I know, one of these weeks I am going to go 3-10.

Ok, enough small talk, on to this week's battles.

Arkansas at Memphis - 11a - ABC - What is this?  An Arkansas team playing no-power conference opponent on the road?  This would have never happened under Frank Broyles.  Still, they should win.  Arkansas 34, Memphis 22

Alabama-Birmingham at Tennessee - 11.45a - SEC - Tennessee had the Georgia game in their grasp last week and let it slip away.  That won't happen this week.  Tennessee 56, UAB 10

Tulane at Ole Miss - 2.30p - ESPN - The Green Wave have been quietly playing pretty good football the past year or two and are 3-0 as they head to Oxford.  The Rebels are 3-0 as well, and looked pretty decent, especially in the second half against Arkansas.  This one may be closer than you think.  Ole Miss 31, Tulane 20

Auburn at Oklahoma - 2.30p - ABC - I'll be honest, both are 3-0 and neither team has impressed me much going undefeated in their first three games.  I just can't see Auburn going into Norman and winning this game.  Oklahoma 35, Auburn 17

Northern Illinois at Mississippi State - 3.15p - SEC - Ok, show of hands for everyone who thought Mississippi State would be 3-0 after three weeks.  Anyone?   Anyone?  Nope, me either.  Good job Bulldogs, let those cowbells sing.  Mississippi State 44, Northern Illinois 14

South Carolina at Missouri - 6p - ESPN - South Carolina was humbled by an energetic Vanderbilt team last week at home in Columbia.   Now the go to Columbia, Missouri to play a Tiger team that hasn't done much wrong the first three weeks.  Mizzou wins the battle of the Columbias.  Mizzou 38, South Carolina 21

Georgia State at Vanderbilt - 6.30p - ESPNU - I'm telling you; the Commodores are about to be 4-0.  I can feel it.  Vandy 45, Georgia State 17

Florida at Miami - 6.30p - ABC - The Gators are 1-2, and the undefeated 'Canes could just end Florida's season Saturday night with a win and send Gator Coach Billy Napier to Kinko's to update his resume.   I really don't think this will be close.  Miami 42, Florida 23

Southeast Louisiana at LSU - 6.45p - SEC - I like this game for one reason and one reason only.  It features the Lions against the Tigers.  Geaux Tigers.  LSU 52, Southeast Louisiana 10

Sam Houston at Texas - 7p - SEC - This is just the game Texas quarterback Arch Manning needs.  The highly touted Longhorn quarterback has looked, well, ordinary (and that is being kind) so far this season.  If the Longhorns are going to do anything this season, he needs to get his act together.  Sam Houston is a good opponent to whip up on.  Texas 49, Sam Hoston 13

Alabama, Kentucky, Ole Miss and Texas A&M all get to sleep in.

Get those snacks ready.  If you're buying, I'll take some chicken wings. Plain, teriyaki or garlic parmesan.

See you next week.  Be safe.  Be kind to each other.

Southern Living Best BBQ Places

 First off let me say, this is not my list, so don't crucify me if your favorite BBQ places isn't on here.  I understand.  I am just the middleman, reporting what a well-respected magazine published in the last week.

We all know what Southern Living is.  I dare say that most of the people who read this blog have/had mothers who were faithful subscribers to the magazine.  I know my mother was, and I know M is.  It truly is the magazine of the South.

On my Instagram account, I follow Southern Living.  They will have interesting stories and the like and frequently will publish articles on food or have lists of some of their favorite places.  That is the purpose of today's blog.

This (Wednesday) morning, one of their stories popped up and caught my eye.  It was entitled "The No. 1 BBQ Joint in the South is in South Carolina.  See the list of the top 50."

Well, don't have to ask me twice, I love lists, and if they involve food, I am twice as interested.  To me, in the summer, BBQ is one of the food groups.  Two or three months ago I wrote a blog on my favorite types of BBQ, and that list hasn't changed, pork steaks are still on top.  But this was a list of the Top 50 BBQ restaurants.  You know what I was anxious to see?   How many of the top 50 places I had been to.  The answer was more than one but less than ten.   I'll give you my list in just a bit.

The folks at Southern Living did their homework.  Not only did they name their top 50 BBQ restaurants, there in depth reviews of each one, talking about why they are special, their location and what cuts they are famous for, but some of the reviews also tell you what kind of wood they burn.  It's great culinary reading.

The top 50 are spread across nine southern states.   As you might expect, Texas, with 17, has the most.  South Carolina is second with 11, followed by North Carolina with six, and Tennessee with five.  Alabama, Georgia and Virginia each have three restaurants listed, followed by Kentucky and Maryland, who each have one.

One thing I found amazing is 14 of the 50 are found in just four cities.  Charleston, South Carolina, which may be the culinary capitol of the South leads the way with five restaurants on the list.  Auston, Memphis and Lockhart, Texas each had three restaurants listed.  To be honest, I'm not real sure where Lockhart, Texas is.  I think it is near Austin.

Since most of you are from Alabama, you are probably wondering who the three BBQ joints are they made the list.  They are...

No. 21 - Big Bob Gibson's in Decatur

No. 18 - Archibald's in Northport

No. 11 - Dreamland in Tuscaloosa

Now the three I have been two m I would guess you have heard of all three

No. 50 - Rendezvous in Memphis

No. 41 - Rodney Scott's in Charleston, SC

No, 21 - Big Bob Gibson's in Decatur.

The Top Three in Southern Livings's countdown of the Top 50 BBQ Restaurants in the South is as follows.

No. 3 - Fresh Aire BBQ in Jackson, GA

No. 2 - Snow's BBQ in Lexington, Texas

No. 1 - City Limits BBQ in West Columbia, SC

Of course we all have our own favorites that we feel are worthy of recognition, and I certainly am no exception.  My faves not listed include... 

Nick's in Carlisle, AR 

The BBQ Hut in Sulligent, AL 

OK Corral BBQ in Muscle Shoals

Pappy John's Original BBQ in Selmer, TN

Michelbob's in Naples, FL

Wright's BBQ in Fayetteville, AR

Dexter BBQ in Dexter, MO

Sugarfire in Washington, MO

Whole Hog Cafe in North Little Rock, AR

The point is, almost all BBQ is good.  I have no doubt if you go to any of the places listed, on Southern Living's list, or my list, you are going to have a wonderful experience.

One final thing, when eating BBQ in the South, it is ok, even considered a compliment to lick the sauce off your fingers while sitting at the table.

Have a great rest of the week.  Hopefully you can fire up your grill at some point.  Be kind to each other, see you down the road.

Potpourri - Vol. 3

 Welcome back kids to another blog bits and pieces.  Just tidbits of life sprinkled in with a few short observations.  

There are two weeks left in the 2025 MLB regular season.  Another way of putting it is my favorite team, the St. Louis Cardinals, have two weeks left in their season.  It has been a long season.

To give you an idea of how long a season it has been, and how bad things are going, Allison Blair, one of my best friends in the world, sent me a text Saturday night about the Savannah Bananas, who are kind of baseball's version of the Harlem Globetrotters.  The article was on Jesse Cole, the owner of the Bananas, who by all accounts is just a really good person.  Anyway, Allison was wondering if I had seen the Bananas play.  I have not but told her the Savannah Bananas sold out Busch Stadium for two consecutive nights earlier this summer.  Conversely, my lowly Cardinals did not have one sell out all year.

The NFL has been going on for a couple of weeks now, and I am happy to say I have not watched one minute of NFL action.

On the other hand, yesterday was a great viewing day for the SEC fan.  Starting with Game Day at 8a, for the next 14 hours I watched all or part of Wisconsin-Alabama, Louisiana-Mizzou, Georgia-Tennessee, Arkansas-Ole Miss, Florida-LSU, A&M-Notre Dame, topped off with Minnesota-California.  Why is it I love college football so much, yet hate the NFL?  Go figure.

P.S.  I loved seeing Vanderbilt win and Notre Dame lose.

I am not making any sort of political statement here, except perhaps showing my own ignorance.  But before he was shot the other day, I had never heard of Charlie Kirk.  Had no idea who he was.  Guess I am out of touch.  But let me say this, and I know some will disagree and be surprised by what I say, some may cheer.  I don't know, and honestly, I really don't care, but I am very surprised by the way the president and others have gone out of their way to lift this man up since the shooting.  I agree, his shooting highlights the worst of American behavior. There is no place for it in a civilized society.  But going to such lengths to honor someone just because he was shot, is wrong.  If you are going to do it for him, do it for everyone who is killed by violence, man or woman, Democrat or Republican, black or white, Jew, Christian or Muslim.

Ok, that is enough on that subject.  Maybe it shouldn't be.  I have a lot of opinions on a lot of things.  Maybe in a week or two.

I am really looking forward to early October.  The Sherrod Ave. Church of Christ, where M and I worship, will be celebrating its 100th Anniversary on Saturday and Sunday, October 4th and 5th.  We have only been attending there for 11 years, but I can tell it is going to be a fun and great weekend.

I plan on writing a blog this week on our recent trip to California.  My younger son Clayton, and his wife Mimi, live just north of San Francisco.  I am not sure I ever want to live in California, but without a doubt, San Francisco is one of the most beautiful cities in the world.  We went up to Bodega Bay and spent time in the Napa and Sonoma Valleys.  The grapes looked succulent, and we stopped at the Sullivan Winery (no relation) just outside St. Helena.  It was all so beautiful.  I love it every time we visit, even if gas is $4.75 a gallon.  Ugh!  

M and I have become slaves to Community Coffee.  It is so good, so full of flavor.  For about two years now, that is all we have bought.

I evoked the memory of my dad and Grandpa Dalton yesterday afternoon.  Between football games, I grilled pork steaks.  They were so good, with a bit of sweet and smoky Sweet Baby Ray's sauce.  M make some potato salad and skillet beans to go with them.  Sorry y'all weren't here.  Maybe next time.

I went to the courthouse on Friday here in Tuscumbia and got license stickers for the cars.  Are you like me, while in the parking lot, I put the sticker on the license plate of the car I'm driving.  Then when I get home, do the same to the other car before going inside.  We are such creatures of habit.

That's enough for now.  I have a list of things I want to write about.  Your inbox may be busy.

Be nice to each other.  See you down the road.

SEC Predictions - Week 3

 Hey kids, welcome back to another fun week of SEC predictions.  The exciting part of this week's schedule is there are five conference games!  Seems a bit early to have that many but should make for some exciting football.  We also have a couple interesting non-conference games as well.

Last week, I went 1-0 in conference games and 13-2 overall, (yes, I picked Vandy over Virginia Tech), so after two weeks, our record stands at a tidy 1-0 in SEC games, and 25-6 overall.  Not a bad start to the 2025 season.  Let's take a look at this week's games.

Wisconsin at Alabama - 11a - ABC - After playing horribly against Florida State, the Tide took it out on Monroe last Saturday.  Now, this is not a really good Wisconsin team like we have seen in the past, but the Tide should still leave Bryant-Denny with a win.  Alabama 42, Wisconsin 17

Oklahoma at Temple - 11a - ESPN2 - I wonder how much Temple had to pay Oklahoma to come to Philadelphia.  Just kidding.  The Sooners should have no problem with the Owls.  Oklahoma 35, Temple 13

South Alabama at Auburn - 11.45a - SEC - Auburn fans will welcome the cupcake on this week's schedule, since they travel to Norman next week.  The key for Auburn?  Don't let anyone get hurt.  Auburn 45, South Alabama 20

Georgia at Tennessee - 2.30p - ABC - After Alabama dispatched the Badgers, take a few minutes, go to the loo, refresh your drink, grab a few more pretzels.  One thing you won't have to do is change the channel, as Georgia travels Rocky Top to take on the Volunteers.  This should be fun.  I'm taking the Dawgs, though I would be hard-pressed to tell you why.  Georgia 34, Tennessee 32

Louisiana at Missouri - 3p - SEC - The Tigers, led by Penn State transfer QB Beau Pribula, looked good in coming from behind to beat rival Kansas last week.  In two games, Pribula has completed 79 percent of his passes, thrown for five touchdowns and no interceptions.  That's pretty good.  Mizzou 44, Louisiana 14

UTEP at Texas - 3.15p - SEC - Another game that should be over after 15 minutes.  Enjoy the Texas Marching Band at halftime.  Texas 56, UTEP 0

Alcorn State at Mississippi State - 5p - SEC - How about those Bulldogs beating a ranked Arizona State team last week!  Another win like that and they will be ready to play Ole Miss!  Mississippi State 28, Alcorn 7 

Arkansas at Ole Miss - 6p - ESPN - A lot of SEC pundits think the Hogs and Rebels will become permanent rivals when the new SEC schedule comes out, so tonight you get a free preview.   Ole Miss 35, Arkansas 28

 Texas A&M at Notre Dame - 6.30p - NBC - I probably won't watch this game, because there are better games.  The Irish are slightly favored, but I would love to see the Aggies come home with a win, realistically, any kind of win.  Texas A&M 34, Notre Dame 24

Florida at LSU - 6.30p - ABC - the fun continues on ABC with what I consider the best game of the day.  Florida will be looking to get back on winning ways after laying an egg at home last week against South Florida.  The Gators will be back, just not this week.  LSU 37, Florida 24

Eastern Michigan at Kentucky - 6.30p - ESPNU - Let me know how this game goes......I won't be watching it.  Kentucky 25, E. Michigan 17

Vanderbilt at South Carolina - 6.45p - SEC - I would really like to pick the Commodores in this one, but common sense says, "no, not this time, maybe later."  Gamecocks at home.  South Carolina 45, Vandy 30

Enjoy the sunshine this weekend and the warm weather.  Light jackets are probably all that will be needed for the night across the south.  Have a great day viewing.  Enjoy your wings.

Be kind to each other, see you next week.

Reflections of a Non-Custodial Dad

M and I got home yesterday afternoon after spending five days in California, the San Francisco area to be more exact.  We flew out of Huntsville last Thursday to spend some time with my younger son Clayton and his wife Mimi....and their cat Winnie.  The California Sullivans live in the city of Novato, about 20 miles north of San Francisco on the 101 in Marin County.

Friday was Clayton's 34th birthday, which was the primary reason for the visit, but it had also been a while since we last saw him and Mimi, so we were all looking forward to getting together.  We had a wonderful visit with the kids, and the time just flew by.  As a dad, I always treasure time when I can be around my two sons, Barclay and Clayton.

My role as a dad has not been exactly what I envisioned.   I expected to be a dad similar to my own dad (except perhaps not quite as much as a fix-it person), but a dad who was there, coached Little League, and offered advice.  A dad who was the spiritual leader of the family, who passed on to his sons the importance of having a good relationship with God.  Above all else, this is the most important thing you can teach your children.  I have failed in all of these things.

No, it wasn't by design, as I said, it was not what I envisioned at all.  But it was my reality, it was how my role as a parent turned out.

The boys' mother and I divorced in 1996, in our 11th year of marriage, while living in Naples, Fla.  In the divorce, she was awarded custody, while I had the boys every other weekend, holidays, birthdays and a good part of the summer.  I was 39, and this was how my "official" parenting was going to be, decided my lawyers, affirmed by a judge.  This was not how I envisioned things being once I became a father.

This blog is about my role as a dad, not about the boys' mother or the divorce.   This is about my failings as a parent, my successes as a parent, nothing else.

I hugged Clayton as we said goodbye at his apartment in Novato.  I seriously don't know when I will see him again.  Hopefully sometime in the next 12 months.  But he has a wife of his own and lives 2,000 miles away.  Logistics matter.  Barclay is closer; he and Sarah and the grandkids are on the outskirts of Atlanta.  We see them with more regularity, and for that I am grateful.

Part of being a dad is listening to them.  What are they saying, perhaps more importantly, what are they not saying.  Being the non-custodial parent, I always thought they seemed happy to see me, and we would have a great time together.  Maybe that was a problem.  The time we had together, I tried too hard to entertain them, take them out.  I was trying to be more a friend than I was a parent.  That was not the right thing to do. 

More than anything else, the thing I missed was not being there every day for Barclay and Clayton.  That grieved me; it still grieves me.    I made it a point to call them every night, and I know over one three or four-year stretch, there were only a handful of nights we did not talk, which I think was good for both of us.

But I didn't know their friends, I didn't know their teachers, what they liked to.  I missed sitting at the dinner table every night and talking about our day, listening to them getting excited about some silly thing that was important to them, which consequently, would then become important to me.  That is what I did growing up.  That is what I wanted to do as a father, but that was not an option.

The summers were nice.  The boys would come to Arkansas for six weeks or so, and we got into a routine.  We would eat together as a family, we would go to church together as a family, we would hang out together as a family.  But by the end of July, they would head back to their mom's in Atlanta.   Maybe they were ready to go back, I don't know.  I do know the emptiness I felt dropping them off at their house or dropping them off at the airport.  After the hugs and the "I love yous," we would go our separate ways.  This was not the way it was supposed to be.

More than once the emptiness turned to tears on the trip home.  Separated for only minutes and already I missed them.

I am confident Barclay and Clayton love me.  I do feel their love.  But I feel that even though I loved them and still love them more than they will ever know, I have failed them.  As I said, I was not there every day, I didn't help them with their homework, I didn't install a ceiling fan and have them watch.  So many things that help define the relationship between a father and son.  I was not there when they needed to talk to their dad.  I wonder if they think about it like I do.

I did not write this to be a downer, but as a reflection.  Leaving Clayton on Monday, I thought of all the times I've left him and his brother.  How do they feel about me, do they fully understand what divorce is?  No matter the intention, once mom and dad make the decision to no longer be man and wife, and one of them leaves, life changes forever.  You can make the argument that having loving parents helps the transition, and there is truth in that.  But the fact is, most nights, dad's spot--my spot at the dinner table--was empty.  That is never how I envisioned my life turning out.

Forgive me, boys, if I have disappointed you or let you down by not being the dad you wanted or even deserved.  It was not because I didn't love you.  Sometimes things just don't work out the way we planned.

I love you both.  Forever, with every breath God has given me.  You are blessings to me, and I am so proud of both of you.

Dads, love your wives, love your children.  Make every effort to stay together.  Your kids need it, and so do you.

Be safe, be kind to each other.  See you down the road.

SEC Picks - Week 2

 (Vallejo, CA) - Greetings SEC fans from the Golden State.  M and I flew out on Thursday to spend some time with my younger son Clayton and his wife Mimi.  Clayton is also celebrating a birthday today.  They live in Novato, not too far off the north end of the Golden Gate Bridge, in the north San Francisco suburbs.  It reminds me of an observation from the late, great Cardinal broadcaster Jack Buck, who observed, "the coldest winter of my life was a summer I spent in San Francisco."  Let's put it this way, when we left Houston this afternoon, it was 95 degrees.  When we landed in San Francisco about 6.30 this afternoon, it was 63 degrees, with a brisk north wind.

But it is Friday and time to do our SEC predictions for the week.  I had a decent first week, but not a great one.  We went 12-4.  Amazingly, or maybe not so surprising, Alabama and Texas got beat on the road, the Tide especially looked woeful.  Kentucky beat Akron which surprised me a bit, and I forget the other one I missed.

On to this week's pics.  Remember, these picks are for entertainment purposes only, I don't mess with point spreads or anything like that.  We have a couple of very interesting matchups, including our first conference game of the year, and one rivalry dating back to the Civil War is renewed.

San Jose State at Texas - 11a - ABC - I would not want to be a Spartan fan this week.  I would imagine Texas is going to take out a week's worth of frustrations on poor San Jose State.  All eyes will be on Texas quarterback Arch Manning, who was, shall we say, awful against Ohio State last week.  Texas 66, San Jose State 7

Utah State at Texas A&M - 11,45a - SEC - I always love it when A&M, Utah State or New Mexico State play each other.  It's Aggie against the Aggies.  I think that is kind of cool.  Let's go with the Aggies, Texas style.  A&M 55, Utah State 14

East Tennessee State at Tennessee - 2.30p - SEC - I would imagine only those who live in the Smokies really care about this game.  Tennessee 42, East Tennessee 10

Ole Miss at Kentucky - 2.30p - ABC - What is this?  A conference game in the second week?  Whose idea was this?  I would think the Rebels would win, but the Wildcats were a bit feisty last week.  Might be worth watching.  Ole Miss 31, Kentucky 24

Austen Peay at Georgia - 2.30p - SEC - C'mon Georgia, seriously?  Don't even try and justify this game, plus I'm sure you had to pay them several million.  Georgi 66, Austin Peay 0

Kansas at Missouri - 2.30p - ESPN2 - I am really, really looking forward to this game. Growing up in Missouri, regarding sports rivalries, we were taught two things.  We don't like the Cubs, but we absolutely hate, despite, have nothing to do with Kansas.  The hatred, and that is not a strong enough word goes back to 1854.  It was a border war between Kansas, a free-state, and Missouri, a slave-state.  Thousands of innocents died.  Google John Brown, or Quantrill's Raiders, or Frank and Jesse James.  When Missouri bolted for the SEC in 2011, Kansas officials said, "we will never play them again.  In anything."  Well, hell has apparently frozen over.   Missouri 37, Kansas 28

South Florida at Florida - 3.15p - SEC - Gators looked halfway decent last week.  The Bulls will not be a pushover.  If it weren't for KU-Mizzou, I might have watched this game.  Florida 28, South Florida 20

Arkansas State vs. Arkansas (at Little Rock) - 4p - SEC - when the legendary Frank Broyles was Athletic Director at Arkansas he said despite pleas from ASU, he would never play that "other" state school. "we have nothing to gain," Coach Broyles said more than once, "and everything to lose."  He was right you know.  But here we are, in a new millennium, and Arkansas is playing Arkansas State in football.  I never expected to see this.  Arkansas 44, Arkansas State 21

South Carolina State at South Carolina - 6p - SEC - I don't see much to write about here, so we will save precious time and space and declare South Carolina the winner.  South Carolina 55, South Carolina State 3

Arizona State at Mississippi State - 6.30p - ESPN2 - My favorite non-SEC mascot, the cartoonish, Salvadore Dali look-alike "Sparky" and his Sun Devils invade Starkville.  I like rooting for the Bulldogs, but they aren't going to win this game.  Arizona State 31, Mississippi State 23

Louisiana Tech at LSU - 6.30p - SEC - Saturday night in Baton Rouge and the Tigers are in town.  Seriously, is there anything better?  I think not.  Well, a bowl of gumbo, some char-broiled oysters and some boudin would be a great place to start.  Maybe run over to Cafe du Monde and grab some beignets.  LSU 59, Louisiana Tech 14

Ball State at Auburn - 6.30p - ESPU - This is not the week to let Auburn impress you.  This is not quite as bad as Georgia having Austin Peay come over and play, but it's close.  Auburn 55, Ball State 0

Michigan at Oklahoma - 6.30p - ABC - It would give me great, great pleasure, I mean great pleasure to see Oklahoma beat a team from that "other conference."  Oklahoma 35, Michigan 24

Vanderbilt at Virginia Tech - 6.30p - ACC - I root for Alabama and Missouri, I root for LSU and I also root for South Carolina, and sometimes Florida and Mississippi State.  But I always, always pull for Vandy.  Wonder why that is?  Go Commodores! Beat them Hokies!   Vandy 41, Virginia Tech 35

Louisiana-Monroe at Alabama - 6.45p - SEC - 2007.  2007. 2007, 2007. 2007. 2007.  Am I getting through?  2007.  2007. 2007.  Alabama 31, Louisiana-Monroe 21

Ok campers, 15 games, 15 winners.  It could happen.  Oh, by the way, I forgot to mention earlier, last week I picked Arkansas to defeat Alabama A&M 52-7.  Well, what do you know, in Fayetteville last Saturday, Arkansas defeated Alabama A&M 52-7!  I'll show myself out.

Be safe, be kind to each other!  See you soon.

KPOC

Sunday afternoon, Tim Scott, who for nearly 50 years, worked at or owned KPOC-AM-FM in Pocahontas, Arkansas, announced to the listening audience that he was retiring, and this would be his last broadcast.  What most did not know, except for a select few, was that KPOC was leaving the air with him.

After 75 years, KPOC, at least temporarily, and possibly permanently, was silent.  The transmitters were turned off, and when early risers on Monday morning tuned their radios to 1420 AM or 104.1 FM, they did not hear anything.  No familiar voices, no early farm reports, no news or obituaries, no sports updates, no more Cardinal baseball games or Razorback football or basketball games.  After one week, no more Redskin football games.

I moved to Pocahontas in the fall of 1999, just a few months after Marilyn and I got married.  She of course, was teaching school at Maynard, while I, in a leap of faith, walked away from 17 years with Trans World Airlines (TWA).  It's funny the things love will make you do.   I did some subbing, but I needed more, having left my management job at TWA behind.

A week or two later, Warren Smith, who went to church where M and I did, came up to me wanting to share a thought.  Warren, who at the time was probably in his mid-60's and owned his own heating and air-conditioning business, had been talking to Tim Scott, owner of the local radio station a few days earlier.  In casual conversation, Scott mentioned he needed an announcer for the late afternoon and evening shift.  Basically from 4 p.m. until sign-off, which in December and January, could be as early as 4.45 p.m., as KPOC-AM was, at that time, licensed as a dawn to dusk station.

I called Tim the next day, we talked, I told him about my experience at KWCK in Searcy nearly 20 years earlier.  He hired me and before the week was out, I was playing music and doing some news.

I still wasn't making enough, and in February of 2000, I was hired by the Pocahontas Star Herald as a reporter/photographer, a job I had and loved for 15 years.  Reluctantly I left KPOC.  I was sorry to go, because I really liked the job.  But reality dictated I needed to do something else.

In those days at KPOC, Eddie Jones, who was the Randolph County Treasurer, was the early morning man on KPOC-FM  He would be there at 5.30, looking dapper like he was going to be meeting the governor, and would play gospel music until seven, then would turn things over to Lloyd Lewallen, who manned the dials until about 10, before he went to his real job, City of Pocahontas Electrician.

It was somewhere in 2004, maybe 2005, when Eddie decided to give up his radio gig and focus solely on his Treasurer job.  Tim approached me and asked if I would take over the early morning shift and work 5.30 to 8.  I talked it over with Anita Murphy, my editor at the Star Herald, and she was fine with it.  My newspaper job had made me fairly well known in the town of 6,500, and she saw me working at the radio for 12.5 hours a week as advertising for the paper.  I agreed.  

For the next 10 years or so, I wore two hats.  First, there was an early morning shift at KPOC, my "fun job."  Then I would go home, change clothes and be at the paper by 8.30 to start my "real job," which most of the time was also fun.

But this blog is about my time at KPOC.  In rural America, especially the rural South, it is hard to describe the importance of local media, whether radio or newspaper.  Pocahontas is a little over 100 miles from Memphis, so we really weren't in their demographics.  Pocahontas is about 40 miles northwest of Jonesboro, which 15-20 years ago, had about 60,000 residents.  Its population in 2025 is nearing 85,000.

The point is, local news came from local sources, not from Memphis or Jonesboro.  

My alarm went off at 4.30 a.m., and within a month, I was waking up before the alarm went off.  I would clean up, maybe shave, maybe not, and be out the door by five.  Most mornings I'd either stop at McDonald's for a sausage biscuit and coffee, or at Riverside Express for the same.  At Riverside, there were always three or four guys in camo standing around drinking coffee in those early morning hours.  It was usually the same ones, and I got to know them.  They would also remind me if I was running late.

I was usually at the station, which sat on U.S. Hwy. 67, just north of town by 5.20.  Bill Endicott was usually already there.  Bill did most of the recording of news, spots, obits and announcements.  For many years he was truly the "voice" of KPOC.  I would take my seat at the controls in the main studio that housed KPOC-FM.  I checked the log for anything new and have my coffee right beside me.  I should add between my stints at the radio station, they became automated, everything was now on computer, and both stations stayed on all night, though KPOC-AM was barely reaching town with 118 watts.

With headphones firmly in place, at 5.30 I would flick the switch and welcome all the early risers, farmers having their breakfast, hunters already out in the field or slough waiting on sunrise, teachers getting ready for another day in the classroom.  Most days, I would give the forecast a few times, and play some rock and roll.  We were officially an "Adult Contemporary" station, but with well over 2,000 songs on the hard drive, it was not hard to go through and pick out songs more to my liking.

Which reminds me of a story.  When I first started at KPOC, in late 1999, I was working one Sunday afternoon, the Cardinal game was over, and I was playing some of my favorite tunes.  The phone rang and I answered cheerfully, "Good afternoon, KPOC."  An elderly lady, at least she sounded elderly to me was on the other end.  She said, "You're not from around here, are you?"  I told her my family was from the area, but I had in fact grown up elsewhere.  "I just have one more question," she said.  "Do you have any Rod Stewart?"  Taken aback by her response, I did recover quickly, "Yes ma'am," I remember saying, "yes we do."   True story.  I could just picture her dancing away in her parlor to "Maggie Mae."

We would have the first agricultural report at 5.50, followed by news from the Arkansas Radio Network at 5.55.  At 6, was ABC News.  More music followed, more weather, and at 6.30, we did a full local 30-minute newscast.  It might include a report of the latest city council meeting in Reyno, or the school board meeting in Maynard.  It might also feature the goings on with the Randolph County Chamber of Commerce, or which churches were holding gospel meetings that particular week.  It was news the locals wanted to here, and it was provided every morning at 6.30, and then again at 9.00.

Lloyd was usually there by 7, and I relinquished control of the board to him.  That gave me time to record spots and get the sports report ready, which I did live at 7.50.  One thing Lloyd and I did every morning was guess birthdays, usually around 7.35.  They were part of "Today in History," which would include the ages of well-known individuals, dead and alive, that had birthdays that day.  There might be as many as 10-15 on the list, and the important thing was not to get shut out.  Because if you didn't get any right, people would let you know.  More than once while out doing work for the paper, or eating lunch, someone would come up to me and sarcastically say, "good job this morning on the birthdays."  Of course I would thank them.

I was not involved in this, because it came on after I left for the Star Herald at 8, was the "Funeral and Death Announcements" brought to you by McNabb Funeral Home.  For years, we had a rotation of four McNabb "spots," and my voice was on all of them.  In fact, I remember once, about three years after we moved to Alabama, we were back in Pocahontas for something and had KPOC on the car radio, and there I was, still doing McNabb commercials.

The obits following the 9 o'clock news, may have been the most listened to time of the day.  Bill, or Lloyd, or Tim, sometimes me, would read all the obits from the area funeral homes.  If someone died and had a connection to Randolph County, even if they lived in Baltimore, we read it.  It was a public service only a small-town radio station could provide.

An Arbitron survey once showed, that between 5.30 a.m. and 9 a.m. on any given weekday morning, 73 percent of the radios turned on in Randolph County, whether at home, in a car or business, 73 percent of them were tuned to KPOC.  That is just a phenomenal number, and let me add, that was not a number any of us working at KPOC took for granted.  Even though we were a 5,000-watt FM, with maybe a radius of 30 miles in each direction, there was an unspoken obligation to get things right.

It is not an exaggeration to say many of our listeners grew up with KPOC or had been listening since it first went on the air.

Two days later, I still cannot imagine there not being a KPOC.  Hopefully, someday, Tim, will find a buyer and sell the station and it will return to the air.  I don't know.  I've already had two ask me if I was going to return to Pocahontas and buy it.  The answer is a definite no.

But I do know this.  It was an honor and a privilege to be a part of the KPOC family for nearly 15 years, just as it was to be a journalist for the Star-Herald.  

At the end of John's Gospel, in John 21.25, the apostle wrote, "Jesus did many other things as well. If every one of them were written down, I suppose that even the whole world would not have room for the books that would be written."

That's the way I feel about KPOC.  They did so much for that community over the last 75 years, there are far more stories than I have written, but I do know this.  KPOC made a difference in the community, and it will be missed.

Thanks for spending some time in this little corner of cyber space.  Have a great week.  Be kind to each other